The First Two Months

Sweet Luke is two months old today. I can't believe it...the time has really flown. The past two months have honestly been a blur. I guess that's pretty normal when you have a newborn in the house, not to mention two other children.

My parents were immensely helpful for the first three weeks when Luke came home. We were bummed when they had to go home to Oregon but we're looking forward to seeing them again at Thanksgiving. Since we've been on our own, we've done pretty well though. We have been so incredibly blessed to have friends and neighbors deliver meals to us for almost 6 weeks – I cannot describe how much easier the evenings have been because of it. We are so grateful for such amazing friends from church and for our friendly neighbors. It's one of the reasons we love living here so much.

There have definitely been some rough moments too – I had a tough bout with postpartum depression – mostly in part due to a medication error, though I think I would have struggled a little with it anyway since I was so sleep-deprived. I don't do well with ongoing sleep deprivation, which also brings with it debilitating bone pain (residual from chemo). I'm doing much better now and feel like I can cope better with all the demands of each day. It's nice to feel like myself again and not immediately reach for the bottle of Advil in the morning because I ache all over. I'm anxious to get back to my BodyPump class. I haven't been able to go yet because Luke's pediatrician doesn't want him to be in the Y nursery due to the severity of the flu. I am walking on the nice days and looking forward to going back soon. I am really proud of the fact that I'm 35 lbs under what I was when I started my pregnancy and I really want to keep it off and get toned up again. I had been able to do BodyPump until I was seven and a half months pregnant, but then had to stop because I was having so many contractions. So it's been 4 months since I've been to the class.

Luke is a great baby – very laid back and easy, which is a huge blessing. He has started to smile at us and he loves nothing more than to be held, swaddled, cuddled, etc. He adores it when the girls talk to him and Anna Claire is such a huge help, holding him and feeding him the occasional bottle if I'm not nursing. Some of my favorite times are holding and nursing Luke while Anna Claire reads to me, or while I read to Leah. Luke is finally sleeping for approximately 3 hours at a time during the night, so I'm getting some great sleep and waking up feeling rested. He doesn't sleep as much during the day but I'm starting to see the beginning of a routine with him, and that will only get better with time.

Leah has finally stopped biting everyone and is settling down. Part of that is because I'm keeping her on a very strict schedule, which seems to really help her. She is such a pistol, that child. I can barely catch my breath on some days. Last week, she put her fingers up both of Luke's nostrils, tried to curl his eyelashes, and also attempted to floss his (non-existent) teeth. Yesterday morning, I caught her trying to pluck Luke's eyebrows. She is fun, though, and loves to take life by the hair and swing it around like a lasso. Gary and I are already praying about how we'll survive the teenage years with her.

The girls are doing AWANA and kids' choir on Sunday nights, which has given Gary and I the opportunity to have a “date night” once a week (with Luke of course, but he's pretty quiet). It's been so wonderful to have some uninterrupted time to talk and connect with Gary...since that time is extremely limited when we're at home with all 3 kids.

I am doing some freelance work now and really loving it. It's a great opportunity for me to use my brain and earn a little money. And strangely enough, I'm getting better at juggling everything because I have to – so I'm even more organized when I work part-time. I'm finding now that I have to be super-organized in order to keep everything running smoothly. If I let up even for a day, the train begins to run off the tracks.

I'm hoping to get some good family pictures once the weather cools off a bit and we can go outside. There's a fountain near us that is really pretty, so we'll venture over there soon and do a photo shoot. More pictures coming later this week of the kids!

Cancer In My Rear View Mirror

Six years ago today, I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. I went on a journey for which you don't need a passport, a ticket or a suitcase. It was no vacation, I can assure you. I found myself on a runaway train with no stops – and one on which I never intended to be a passenger.

I had a 16 month old baby girl at the time, and I was still fairly newly married. Nothing says “get to know your spouse” like having your husband see digital pictures of your diseased ovary post-surgery, having him help you get dressed, and having him shave your head in the shower because all your hair is falling out. In sickness and in health, indeed. I am painfully aware that there are many marriages that do not survive cancer. I've seen it happen up close and personal.

Today, I want to honor my husband, Gary. He is one of the bravest and most loyal people I know. There were many days when he would get up and go to work when I was sick and I know he was terrified. Terrified that we wouldn't make it through to the spring. Terrified that something would happen to me. Terrified that he would have to raise Anna Claire alone. Gary held my hand through many dark hours, wiping my tears and reminding me that together, we could make it through anything. He reminded me on a regular basis that cancer would not define me – it would be a new ministry. He told me how beautiful I still was to him. He told me how strong I was, even though I was very weak. He assured me constantly of his love for me.

I am happy to say that cancer is now in my rear view mirror...just a part of my past but no longer a part of my “present.” I have now had two beautiful children post-cancer. I've had no recurrences. Miraculously, I have entire days when I don't even think of cancer...something I never thought possible.

And cancer has birthed a beautiful ministry. For a long time after I recovered, I didn't want to have anything to do with cancer. I didn't want to meet anyone else who had cancer, support anyone with cancer, or talk about it. But God gently pursued me and continued to put people in my life who needed a compassionate heart and a willing ear as they traveled their own journey with cancer. I can honestly say now that walking alongside other women who face cancer is one of my passions. I love to encourage them, to cry with them, to make them laugh, and to just sit with them. While it was a devastating diagnosis and a very painful time in my life, ovarian cancer has become one of the best blessings I've experienced.

“Praise the Lord, my soul; all my inmost being, praise His holy name.
Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits -
Who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
Who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion,
Who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.”
Psalm 103: 1-5

Lord Jesus, You've been so faithful to me...

The Grocery Game, Take One

A couple of friends recently introduced me to The Grocery Game. It's an easy way to combine store sales and coupons (clipped, downloaded and "non-clip" coupons) in order to save the maximum amount of money. I've clipped coupons in the past but honestly it got overwhelming when time was running short so I abandoned it for a long time.

I finally realized that I was tired of paying full retail prices for my groceries and other everyday necessities. I haven't worked since last December and with 3 kids now and only one of us working outside the home, I need to find ways to save money any way I can.

I joined last week and spent a couple of days clipping coupons and figuring out how the whole thing works. A lady named Teri put the whole thing together. And she just wrote a great book about The Grocery Game. - it retails for $12.99 but I found it on Amazon.com this morning for only $2.98! Wahoo!!! It does a great job of explaining the whole process for how to get groceries and other items for a significant discount. I can't wait for it to arrive.

Anyway...I shopped two different stores with my game list. I selected Kroger, and although there weren't many items on my list this week due to the holiday weekend, I saved $19.63 and spent $23.92. It was easy to do! Then we went to the other store, which I won't mention by name, because the experience wasn't nearly as good. They had some of the deals, but they were already out of a lot of the items and the store wouldn't substitute similar things. The employees were also not very helpful when I had questions, the store was incredibly busy, Luke was crying some of the time, and basically I decided not to go back to that store - I think I'm going to stick to Kroger. By the time we left the 2nd store, I just wanted to go home and suck my thumb! By the way, I don't recommend doing this little activity with your three-year-old who needs a nap. BAD decision. I'm going by myself next time.

At the second store, I spent $112.31 and saved $31.15. I would have saved more except they were out of some of the items I needed. So, my total savings for today were just under $51.00. Not too shabby for my first attempt! My goal is to save enough money each month that it pays for Leah's school tuition...a goal that should be easily attainable.

Try it for yourself - it's amazing! It only costs $10 every 8 weeks - $1.25 per week. And the first 4 weeks is free to try so you don't have to worry about paying for something you if you don't like it.

Moby Wrap, I Adore You

Some good friends recently gave us a gift basket of baby items for Luke. It had a toy, a bottle, a pacifier, and a Moby Wrap carrier and receiving blanket. I was especially excited to try the carrier. I'd used other carriers before but never one like this.

It is hands down the BEST baby product I've ever owned. I absolutely love it. And Luke is so happy sitting in it. It swaddles him tightly against me and he immediately goes to sleep in it. I can very discreetly nurse in public if necessary and when he's particularly fussy, he calms right down - so I even wear it when watching TV, sleeping, and doing chores around the house. The beauty of it is that you really do have two hands free to do other things and he stays safely inside. It's made of a lightweight cotton that is very soft and breathes well - which has been wonderful in our hot climate. I really wish that I'd discovered it earlier so I could wear the girls in it. The other thing I love about it is the way that it provides support across my back - both lower and upper - and doesn't put pressure in one part of my back the way other carriers sometimes do. It's awesome!

The other thing I love about the Moby products is the receiving blanket. It's especially large and made of the same soft, breathable cotton so we'll be able to use it to wrap Luke up even after he's bigger. So many of the receiving blankets now are so small - which is fine if you have a newborn, but not so good if you have a bigger baby who still wants to be swaddled or wrapped up. This is a fabulous blanket.

And the best part? If you want to own either of these products, they're completely affordable! The carrier is only about $40, and the blanket is under $20! Such a great deal - especially when other carriers and blankets are so much more expensive and not nearly as nice.

Have a baby? Try it! Need to buy a baby gift and not sure what to give? I'd highly recommend the Moby Wrap and Blanket. They're both winners in my book!

The Story of Luke

Luke Reagan Bartlett joined our family on Thursday, August 13, 2009 at 6:01 pm. He weighed 7 lbs, 10 oz, and he's 19.25 inches long. We are so in love with him!

I was admitted at 5 am on the 13th for an induction because of my history of blood clots. We checked in, and got settled. They started my antibiotics and ran those for a couple of hours before hanging the pitocin drip. I also got my epidural around the same time as my pitocin because I was already contracting so much...I suspect that I may have been in early labor on my own already. Unfortunately, the epidural caused my blood pressure to crash to 66/32, which made me feel horrible. I hope to never experience that again. They were able to quickly fix it with a shot of ephedrine and things got much better.

My doctor broke my water around 1:30 pm, fully expecting Luke to arrive soon after based on my birth experience with Leah. Unfortunately, Luke had other plans. His hand and elbow were up next to his head and the doctor was unable to tell if he was holding the umbilical cord or not. She tried a couple of times to push his hand out of the way but he moved it back again. Things continued to go very slowly throughout the afternoon, so I finally told my family to come up to the hospital because some good friends were bringing everyone dinner. Mom and Dad arrived with the girls just after 5 pm and shortly after that, I started complaining that I could feel nothing on my left side, but could feel every contraction on the right side - I was getting really uncomfortable. They tried to refresh my epidural but it didn't work. I told my doctor that I was still feeling a lot of pain and she checked and said, "Oh gosh - he's RIGHT here! It's time to have a baby." Just a few pushes later, Luke joined us.

It was fun that my family was already at the hospital - they got to come in the room right after Luke was born and we had a great time holding him and getting to know him. I had the most amazing labor & delivery nurse - she has children similar ages to our girls (and coincidentally is also a good friend of one of my neighbors!), and she asked Anna Claire and Leah if they'd like to watch her check out the baby. At our hospital, the baby never leaves your room - even to be cleaned up, checked out, etc. They watched her do all the newborn procedures on Luke and she was so patient with their many questions. Then the nurse asked if Anna Claire would like to give Luke his first bath. She was SO excited! Our nurse Michelle really made the experience so special for us - Anna Claire washed his hair, bathed him, then put a diaper on him and showed Michelle how she could swaddle him (she learned this in her sibling class). It was so neat.

We came home on Saturday night, and since then, we've been settling in pretty well. He's a great eater and loves to hear his sisters talk to him - he's really responsive to their voices. He is nursing approximately every 2-3 hours and sleeps well in between, which allows me to rest. Since Gary had to go back to work this week, it's been nice to have my parents here - they are such a help with the girls, laundry, cooking, etc. The girls have been having a great time with them!

Luke has had some jaundice and he's lost more weight than the doctor would like, but after a couple of trips to the doctor this week and some blood tests, his bilirubin is improving and he's gained 2 oz in the past 2 days, so he's now up to 7 lbs, 3 oz - his lowest weight was 7 lbs, 1 oz. It's hard to believe that he's my biggest baby.

More updates soon - he happens to be sleeping soundly right now in my lap, which has given me an opportunity to do a blog update. The rest of the time, I'm not sure where the time goes - it seems like there's always something that needs to be done!